Enthusiasm Propels the World

What a LONG week. I am completely exhausted – mentally and physically. And I won’t have a lazy day until Sunday. Wah. After a mentally draining Monday, I spent most of Tuesday afternoon/evening in a car doing the drop off for RAGBRAI. SO MANY people. All you RAGBRAI-ers… get at it. You rock. It’s on my bucket list to complete the whole thing – but first, I need a bike. And some miles on that seat. Ouch. Maybe another year. Anywho – Tuesday night I got to puppy sit the Germans. And those little turds thought it was a good idea to wake me up at 6 am on Wednesday morning. I get it – they were hungry because they couldn’t eat after 10 pm since they had a dentist appointment on Wednesday morning. After dropping them off I headed to work for a busy morning. And then I got to pick them up over lunch. We hung out while I ate Pizza Bagel Bites (pizza in the morning, pizza in the evening, pizza at supper time – when pizza’s on a bagel, you can eat PIZZA ANY TIME!! You’re welcome) and watched Maury (who’s the father?!). That’s the best part about going home over lunch – you get to watch terrible daytime TV talk shows. That’s literally the ONLY THING I miss from being home in the summers during school. That AND inhaling cans of Spaghetti-O’s. Good stuff. Being a kid was so easy. Why can’t I go back there? Sigh.

Tuesday morning was a morning of exciting news – not necessarily for ME, but for the roomie. As the kick ass consultant he is, he gets to head to Cedar Rapids and work there on a project during the week and be home on the weekends. Which is SO GREAT for him – more money, great experience, 100% billable, etc. However – this goes all the way through the end of March. Like 8 months from now. Which means Monday through Thursday, Toby and I will be kicking it, single girl style. My current plan for those months consist of working out, reading, dinner and coffee dates with friends, phone dates, Netflix marathons, and probably a little bit of “poor me, poor me” time. Don’t get me wrong – I love my alone time. Sometimes it’s nice to stay at home alone, with a glass (bottle) of wine after a long day of work. Pants off at the door and I don’t MOVE from the recliner till it’s time to go to bed. Those days are great. But doing that four days a week… sigh. Sadness. I’m going to miss my snuggle buddy – although I’m sure Toby will take over nicely – and also my someone to watch mindless TV with while we eat dinner. No one will be there to “sensuous” a beer for me (Sensuous up… can you get me a drink?) and as it turns out, Toby doesn’t have thumbs to help me out. He really needs to get a job to start helping with rent.

I know I’m being a little selfish here, that I’m the ONLY one who will be sad that I’m sleeping alone, coming home to an empty house, etc. But this will be hard for him as well. Staying in a hotel or furnished apartment for 8 months doesn’t sound awesome to me either. Sure it will be an easy place to keep your stuff – but it’s not HOME. And those are going to be long days for him. Four 10-hour days, with some additional work on Friday – it wears me out just thinking about it. And I feel like this winter will not be awesome… hopefully Jack Frost/Mother Nature are nice to us and there’s not an outrageous amount of snow where he’s unable to make it back to Des Moines. I’ll definitely be doing the no-snow dance WEEKLY that whole winter. It’s going to be hard, and it’s going to be a test. But we can handle it. Maybe I’ll become a crafter while he’s gone. Maybe not. We’ll see. We’ll see what Pinterest does to me while he’s gone.

In other news… I started reading a new book I’d seen a thousand times at Target, and once I bought it, I put it on my shelf for three months and never touched it. So Monday over lunch, I cracked that bad boy open. Susannah Cahalan’s memoir called “Brain on Fire: My Month of Madness” terrified me. I’m only 1/3 of the way through it, but I know once I sit down with some concentration I will FLY through it. This first part is her going through a psychosis really – different manic and depressive states, seizures, nausea, not eating, etc. The most impressive part about this – she doesn’t remember most of it. This book is all accounts of her doctors, parents, friends, nurses, etc. And the worst part – they can’t figure out WHY all this is happening. Her CT, MRI and EEG scans all came back completely fine. Yet she was having all these crazy things happen to her. It’s really a little bit scary – because some things I can relate to from my own personal happenings. They’re obviously not as severe – but this is really the first time I’ve gotten to revisit my “week of madness” since it happened. Plus – I LOVE books that deal with the brain and all the crazy, amazing things that happen inside that gray matter. If you get a chance, read this. I’ll gladly lend it out.

I’m pretty pumped about work right now. Things are going well, I’m getting a raise (yay!) and I’m getting bigger projects I get to be in charge of. Come August, we will be holding a Wellness Fair in the office. Our benefits vendors will be in the office, we will have yoga and healthy snacks, and a lunch and learn. All things I am REALLY excited to plan. And next week, I’m heading to our corporate office in Chicago. On Thursday, I will attend a seminar downtown – Leadership and Management for Women. Then on Friday, I will be in the office out there, working in the morning and assisting with the company picnic that afternoon! I planned a great time to visit. And then I get to hang out with one of the girls who used to be on my team out there on Friday night! And after a brunch Saturday morning, I’ll head back to Des Moines. Hooray for mini vacation weekends! And after that little mini work vacation, I’ll hit the books. Because this winter, I’ll be taking my PHR (Professional in Human Resources) exam. Lots of studying and tests to take. Let’s see if I can remember how to do this. Those extra three letters behind my name can only help… and then come May, another three letters: CAP (Certified Administrative Professional.) Do you know how good I’ll be at writing emails by then? Damn. Go me.

And now my dears, it’s time for me to go. I vow, during my next 8 months of loneliness (okay I won’t be totally lonely – just sometimes) to write more. I promise. I pinky swear. 

Love and memories, hugs and kisses, all that jazz –

S

Wander.

I inhaled, I exhaled. I cried listening to an operatic aria while embraced in a strong, loving hug. I heard the word “nipple” more times than if I’d been at a doctor’s office or health class. I meditated in the rain. I hiked through the mountains. I ate lots of granola. I wore spandex every day. I relaxed, I rejuvenated. I strengthened my practice and learned about myself. I stepped out of my comfort zone. I bonded with my love over 28 hours on the road. I smiled and laughed SO MUCH. I hugged and held hands with strangers. I brought sexy back with 100 of my newest, closest friends. I stood in awe with my mouth gaping wide at partner acro yoga. I ate new food, I drank new beer. I wandered. And I want to go back. Soon.

This was definitely an active vacation – and I’m not even mad about it. Between four and six hours of activity per day – not including the “hike” it took to get from our condo to Upward Facing Mountain. I was physically EXHAUSTED each and every night. And I LOVED it. And what I loved even more? The mental clarity I had each day. I spent a lot of time getting out of my own head – which was sometimes more difficult than getting into a difficult posture. We women are naturally wired where it’s hard for our brains to shut up. Maybe it was the open air, maybe it was the lack of oxygen to my brain due to the heightened elevation and altitude, maybe it was the fact that I was relaxed and could just LET IT GO – but I got out of my head HARD. It was amazing to awaken from shavasana and have NOTHING on my mind. It was amazing to begin a two hour practice with a ten minute meditation – to settle into stillness and clear my mind from whatever was plaguing me at that moment. Clarity. It’s a beautiful thing.

Colorado is one of the most BEAUTIFUL places in the world. I say that because I haven’t been many places in the world. But seriously – it’s GORGEOUS. Driving through western Iowa and ALL of Nebraska is a real bore – although I did get to see my college roomie for a hot minute during a dinner time pit-stop in Lincoln. Even the eastern side of Colorado is flat and boring – until you see the mountains in the distance. Once that happens, the smile on your face grows. Maybe it’s because I’ve lived in the Midwest my entire life, or maybe it’s because I have never been to Colorado anytime during the year that it’s not covered in HUNDREDS of inches of snow. Taking pictures during the drive in doesn’t do it justice at all. The mental pictures I took will hopefully be burned into my memory forever – and hopefully I can rekindle them at another time. Gorgeous. 

I want to go back. I want to wake up to the birds singing each morning, rather than a dump truck or a construction crew. I want to breathe in the mountain air. I don’t want to drive places. I want to lay in the grass and just BE. Just knowing that I had nothing I HAD to do each night really sets your mind at ease. I didn’t HAVE to do laundry. I didn’t NEED to do dishes. I could take a nap if I wanted to without worrying about something not getting done. This vacation was needed and necessary. And I feel wonderful now that I’m back. My head is clear, my heart is full. I’m closer than ever with my roomie and we’ve discussed a return trip to our Heaven. And we’d add on to our trip: white water rafting, zip lining, more hiking. 

Some of the simplicity I felt there is something I want to make sure I continue back at home. Enjoying a cup of coffee on the porch before starting the day. A long walk to quiet my thoughts. Really ENJOYING the beauty of nature – not just SEEING it. Smile and saying hello to people I pass by. Continuing to step out of my comfort zone. Being fucking happy. Seriously. Just being happy with my life. There is so much greatness in my life – in everyone’s lives. Life is so GREAT. Live it that way. Without regrets.

This vacation awakened my soul. I want to be better, do better, be happier. I want to challenge myself, challenge others, learn more. I found what makes me so happy I want to continue being that happy. 

Namaste lovers.

S